on Mon Apr 30, 2012 7:47 pm
Re: ok soooo where do all the jewish single ladies hang out?
Listen, with my absymal track record, I'm the last person to be giving advice on that sort of thing (unless you want to know how to pick up 'fallen flowers') but Dade is right, you can't really limit yourself to a "category" of woman.
If you're limiting yourself to someone who believes in the same pissed-off old man in the sky that you do, you're ignoring a whole slew of potential girls out there for yourself. Sure, in an ideal world, my long-term girlfriend is a sensible blonde Russian girl in her late twenties from St Petersburg, but I'm not banking on that. If one day a loudmouth Puerto Rican girl comes along and knocks me off my feet, well, that's fine by me. And if my parents think she's a loudmouth Puerto Rican, well, that's their problem, not mine. Realistically they can't bitch since my mom is white and my dad is Colombian. But anyways...
I kind of see where you're coming from with the Jew thing, since you probably don't want to rock the boat with your mother, but to be honest, it's your life, not hers. Any sensible parent will come around on something like that. You'd be surprised. You could be gay and your mom would come around on it.
And yes, don't actively look. The dating sites are a scam. The only beneficiaries of Jdate are the guys who founded Jdate. Even the Jewish girls I know won't use it. Or any of those other sites for that matter. After a bit they seem like Facebook, but you're paying for it. Even Adult Friend Finder is scammish.
The best thing for you to do right now is get out there and socialize. I'm not saying join me on the Terrace every Sunday morning (besides, I leave by 8:30 nowadays) but there's plenty of opportunities for you to put yourself out there and mingle. Our little crew actually meets outside of clubs more often than not nowadays. A few weeks ago we were at Mercadito for Kat's birthday for happy hour. We were done by 10ish. Sure, some of us went elsewhere after, but no one's gonna hold a gun to your head to go to a club. My birthday party was at Chalk on a Friday. We had a few drinks, a few laughs, and shuffled over to Lost Weekend. We were done by 2 AM. And we weren't even that fucked up by the end of it. Fact is, a lot of us work or have worked in nightlife and we value the socializing aspect of things more than the music side of things nowadays. I work in nightclubs but I'd rather hang out with my friends in a bar or lounge. Since when I'm at a club I'm working and I need to be mobile.
Coach does art-related things a few times a month, and they don't go late or take place in a wild club either. And they're usually free, and with plenty of intelligent girls who go to them.
I'll probably do a TNL party again real soon, maybe the Friday of MDW somewhere on the mainland, and you're more than welcome to come out to it. You'll know all the girls obviously but they often bring non-board friends.
And to be honest, you should probably play the field a bit too. You're what, 34? You still have quite a few years to "settle down". I'm not suggesting going on a chocha binge like I did (it gets old after a bit) but don't go out wife-shopping. Get out of the house, play the field, see who is out there, and you'll rack up some experience and that way you don't get played as easily. There's nothing wrong with a few one-night-stands as long as everyone's OK with it.
Oh, and if I can recommend one thing ASAP. Get your own place. Even if it's not the "best", get your own place. Any girl, whether it's your one-time playmate for the evening or someone you are looking to go the distance with, isn't gonna be too fond of having to tiptoe around your mother and sister. I'm sure you have some money squirreled away, dip in the well and get yourself a little apt somewhere. It doesn't have to be a condo in Brickell. Even if you lived on your own in Kendall, that's more appealing to a girl than living with your mom. And besides, your family is local, you can stop in and see them whenever you want.